Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
