Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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