none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
