and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
