You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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