i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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