either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
