States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize