hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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