you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
