Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
