I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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