Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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