get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
