You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
