so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize