I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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