Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
