how do flat chested girls get laid?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
