So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
True college students do jello shots in the library
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
