I think scott just propositioned me for sex
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I can't turn off my feet"
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
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