how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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