yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
