I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Randomize
