walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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