brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
