I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
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