I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
she pinky promised me she was 18
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
