thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Watching her eat just hurts me
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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