his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
