see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
