The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
