Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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