PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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