I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Randomize
