it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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