This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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