this boner is exhausting
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I'm always down for nudity.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
