Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
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