I want to make a zoo with you.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Oh god it's open bar.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
