So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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