I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
