just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
