ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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