I don't usually arrange sex via text message
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
