He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
if i died would you start the facebook group?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
