i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
should my penis look like a turkey
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
