the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Randomize
