yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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