they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
