You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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